Once things start to become a bit more serious in a relationship, the development of certain rituals can be a great tool for connecting with your partner on a deeper level. My boyfriend and I love to explore many different types of these rituals. Here are a few ideas to help get you started.
1. Make a happiness jar.
This is perhaps one of our favorite rituals. We made this jar at the beginning of this year, and ever since, we have been filling it with beautiful memories. The idea is that every time we feel joy or happiness about something, we write it down on a piece of paper and put it in the jar. We each write our papers separately, but add them to the same jar.
You can write about something you did together, something that made you laugh, or even a simple act of love that your partner did. For example, there was this one day that I came home to flowers on the table and my favorite lunch waiting for me. I definitely wrote that memory down and put it in the jar.
Whenever one of us is feeling sad, we pick one paper from the jar and read it out loud, and that immediately cheers us up. The good thing about the happiness jar is that it reminds you that there are always things to be grateful for, even if they are small. And, on the last day of the year, you can open the jar and read through all of your memories!
2. Make a wish together.
Every time we travel to somewhere new, we select a special spot and make a wish! We do not tell the other person what our wish is, but we do ask for it at the same time. The first time we made a wish together, we were at the Love Locks bridge in Cologne, Germany. After having hung our lock on the bridge’s fence, we threw the key into the river. And while the key was going into the water, we both made a wish. A few months later, we both revealed what our wish was, and realized that it had already come true. The best part of this story is that we both had asked for the same thing, to move in together!
One great wish-making tip I can give you is to do it whenever you are in nature! There is something magical about being close to water, mountains, rivers or trees. It is like the universe is saying: I hear you.
3. Make a vision board.
Vision boards are personal tools you can use to focus on your short and long-term goals. And sharing one with your partner can help you reach your goals faster. Plus, it’s even more fun making these together! Since the two of you will be collaborating in turning the board into a reality, it will give you a feeling of achievement and teamwork.
Every time you accomplish certain goals from the board, make sure to mark it and then focus on a new area that needs to be taken care of. Experiencing success together will make your relationship stronger.
4. Be in the moment.
Whenever you eat together, or go for a walk, make it a point to disconnect from your phone and connect with your partner instead. Talk about your day and be in the moment.
That said, turning off your phone does not always mean you are in the moment. Try to turn off your internal dialogue too, so that your thoughts don’t distract you from what your partner is saying.
We like to visualize things we want to happen for us in the future together, like going on holidays to a certain place, buying a new house, or having a baby. All we do is close our eyes, and let our deepest desires guide our thoughts. Sometimes, we even do a guided visualization. One of us acts as a guide and asks the other to imagine herself/himself being in a beautiful location, like the beach or the mountains.
You can practice visualization almost anywhere – on the couch, in the shower, or at the park. But we like doing it in bed before going to sleep. By putting positive thoughts in our mind, the body relaxes, and we attract more of what we want in life.
Finally, I would like to encourage you to create your own rituals. Think about something you both like doing on a regular basis, and share it in the comments!
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